J.J. Fiend
Birthplace: 2336 W Lawrence Ave, Chicago, IL 60625
Gimmick: The Jimmy John’s–Powered Psychopath
Record: 1× FNF Finalist (FNF 6)
JJ Fiend isn’t just a fan of Jimmy John’s — the bastard is a devotee, a zealot, a condiment-junkie disciple of whatever the hell that chipotle ranch/aioli/mustard abomination is that he worships like it’s holy water. The man walks into every FNF event smelling like a sandwich shop that’s on fire. And he loves it.
From the moment he showed up in Friday Night Flights, JJ Fiend became a lightning rod of chaos. Loud. Unhinged. Dramatically, almost heroically terrible at drafting darts charts. And no one despises that more than John Pork, who sees JJ Fiend’s miserable draftsmanship as a personal insult to the city of Chicago — the city they both, regrettably, crawled out of.
Their rivalry is pure venom. CM Punk vs. Seth Rollins energy, except dumber, louder, and pettier.
It boiled over in FNF 4. Pork tossed one too many barbs about JJ’s “crayon-level charts,” and JJ Fiend snapped like a breadstick left in the sun. What followed was a brutal backstage assault that left John Pork injured and scrambling for medical help — only for JJ Fiend to immediately get kidnapped by The Night-Mariner, vanishing from the league in the kind of bizarre storyline twist only FNF could produce.
When he finally returned, the crowd went ballistic — mostly because they weren’t sure if they were hallucinating — and he clawed his way to his first and only FNF Finals appearance at FNF 6. It became an instant classic… for John Pork. JJ Fiend fought like hell, but Pork put on what many still call the greatest darting performance in FNF history, beating JJ Fiend and ripping his dreams in half like yesterday’s Jimmy John’s napkin.
Since then? JJ Fiend’s been… mid. Occasionally funny, occasionally tragic, often downright shit, but always entertaining in that “you can’t look away from the trainwreck” kind of way. He’s chaos wrapped in deli paper — unpredictable, combustible, and somehow still beloved.
Because at the end of the day, nobody else brings the same mix of condiments and carnage quite like JJ Fiend.